Starting Therapy as a Neurodivergent Client: What to Expect
When you’re neurodivergent, the world can seem like it isn’t made for you. It can be overstimulating, unpredictable, and filled with social expectations that don’t quite make sense.
I’m here to tell you that therapy is made for the wonderful, authentic you.
As you consider starting your therapeutic journey, you might wonder:
What will the therapist ask? Will they understand how I communicate? What if I need extra time to process? What if I’m too much?
As both a therapy intern and someone on the autism spectrum, I’ve experienced therapy from both sides of the room. I know how much courage it takes to begin, and how confusing it can be when no one explains what to expect.
My goal with this post is to make that first step feel a little less intimidating and for you to visualize the therapeutic space with you in it.
What Happens in a First Session
Your first therapy session is usually about getting to know you, not testing or judging you.
At NCTP, your therapist will go over confidentiality and paperwork, ask about your goals or background, and explain how sessions will work. If you’d like, feel free to bring notes or lists, ask for structure (“What will we talk about today?”), and/or mention sensory or communication preferences (lower lighting, fidget toys, weighted blankets, eye contact breaks, activities that include your special interest, etc.)
Common Worries (and Why They’re Okay)
It’s normal to wonder if therapy will “work” for you, especially if your mind or communication style is different from the therapist’s.
What if:
“I don’t know what to say.”
Totally fine. A good therapist will help you find a starting point. There is no safer place to share whatever is on your mind than in this space.
“I’m afraid they won’t understand me.”
Ask early on about their experience with neurodivergent clients. The right therapist will welcome your feedback. Know that you are unique, just like everybody else. It takes time to get to know you and what “works” best for one person may not work for another. Therapy is all about tweaking modalities and treatment plans to best accommodate you and your needs.
“I don’t express emotions like other people.”
Therapy isn’t about performance. Your inner experience matters, even if it looks different on the outside. You’re the expert on your own life, and we are here for it. One beautiful thing about this profession is that there are a million and a half ways to approach the same topic, and we as therapists can often get creative in our approaches. We are happy to adapt to what suits you best!
Finding the Right Therapist
You deserve someone who views neurodiversity as a difference rather than a deficit.
Questions you can ask during your first meeting:
“How do you support neurodivergent clients?”
“Are you comfortable adapting communication or structure?”
“How do you handle feedback if something doesn’t work for me?”
It’s totally normal for you to not mesh with every therapist you meet. Feel free to search for a therapist based on their specialities, modalities, and experience, but also know that the initial appointment is an opportunity to ask your therapist questions to see if they are a good fit for you.
Making Therapy Work for You
Small adjustments can make sessions feel safer and more productive, like bringing a fidget or comfort object, asking for visual outlines, requesting light and sound adjustments, and communicating your processing style (“I may need a moment to think” or “I prefer to write things down”)
Therapy works best when it adapts to you, not the other way around. Come and feel free to leave your mask at the door and know that you are safe and supported no matter what.
Find a therapist who’s right for you.